• Sunshine and Unicorns
  • Sunshine and Unicorns
  • Sunshine and Unicorns
  • Sunshine and Unicorns
  • Sunshine and Unicorns
sunshine & unicorns: a blog about love, learning, and life in the upper midwest

14 August 2009

i'm in the high-fidelity first class traveling set and i think i need a lear jet

One thing I've noticed since becoming immersed in the wedding world is a major tenancy toward spending... a LOT. Many future brides have shared (on blogs, message boards, and other mediums) about the splurges they've made on their own health, appearance, and mental well being. From new skincare regimens to personal trainers, a lot of brides have used their upcoming weddings as an excellent excuse to make positive and rewarding changes in their self-care.

I have frequently tried to talk myself into things like this. I build myself up and decide to spend the money on better shampoo or a manicure or something that's just for me. And then I get to the store or the website and... I just. Can't. Do it. I talk myself out of it. We have too many important things to worry about; I feel horribly guilty and irresponsible spending $40 on a manicure or $200 on good makeup. I rarely even go shopping for clothes unless I need something, and half the time I'll either talk myself out of the purchase, or try to find it as cheaply as possible. (Even though Bf is completely on board with me spending money on myself.)

Case in point: I recently won a free tube of Bad Girl Waterproof mascara. My normal waterproof mascara is the basic Maybelline Great Lash Waterproof Mascara. I'm pretty happy with it, but it's a little clumpy and makes my eyelashes feel heavy when I wear it. It's also pretty difficult to remove. Not the case with Bad Girl. This is The Shit. I can wear it every day, and wash it off at night. No flakes, no clumps, no eyelids-stuck-together, and it even makes my lashes and eyes look a lot better than the Great Lash does. It's awesome. It makes me think that more expensive makeup is a worthy investment. But the thing is... I won it. It's normally about $20, whereas my Great Lash is about $6. Would I buy Bad Girl again? Probably not. I'd probably stand around in front of the display, holding the tube and having a mental budgeting pep-talk. I might even walk halfway to the checkout before ultimately returning it to the shelf. When it comes to me, I am cheap. Even though I know that "you get what you pay for" in a lot of cases.

But here's my issue: It's not that we don't have any money to be flexible with. It's just that I like to spend that money on stuff that's for both of us (or just Bf!). I guess that's where my priorities lie. I can't see spending $50 on a mani/pedi when Bf and I could go out to a nice dinner with that money instead. $200 on my dress? That was hard. Especially when I know that Bf could use some new computer monitors, or that we could have put that money toward a car loan or honeymoon savings.

I have made some investments in myself. I pay for prescription medicines that have practically cured my acne (they're only partially covered by insurance). I get my hair cut at an Aveda salon instead of Cost Cutters (but I don't buy their expensive hair or skin products). I buy a lot of shoes (albeit, mostly clearance shoes). But that's about where the me-spending stops.

I'm just not good at spoiling myself.